I survived.

Oh man. That was rough. He didn't yell and he didn't call me any names, but I sure felt like a b... Feel free to enter any expletives that start with b in that space. I am sure I probably fall under any of those categories.

He wasn't mean to me, which was nice. Actually, our fight went surprisingly well. He told me what frustrated him, why it did, and then he said he was glad to get it off his chest. He handles frustration so much better than I do. I am so glad he doesn't sit around and pout for three hours waiting for someone to come and make it better like I do... so embarrassing.

Hardest part of the night... Finding out how overwhelmed he is with all of his responsibilities right now and knowing that is was me that set him over the edge and brought a little moisture to his eyes. Honestly, I felt like crap. I wanted to curl up in a corner and not come out... Too bad I am kind of large and I wouldn't stay hidden for very long.

All in all, the fight only lasted about 20 minutes. I don't enjoy fighting with anyone, but especially not with Spencer and this might sound weird, but I enjoyed working things out with him. I don't think either of us is concerned about who is right or who is going to come out on top, we both just want it to be over and the other person to be happy again. We work together well. At least I think so... He probably still thinks I am a brat.

I am sorry Spencer. You are still my favorite... Hopefully I am still somewhere near the top of your list too.

I know that this video is highly inappropriate for a young BYU girl's blog, but I have to include it in this post. The first time I saw the first part of this movie, I totally thought of me and Spencer.

It wasn't until this afternoon when I talked to my friend Steven that I realized that the last part of the clip was relevant to my relationship as well. Not so much the part of having another man in the picture, but I have lived my life trying to receive approval of those around me in the choices that I make. I value people's opinions and it is really hard for me when those people that I love disagree with me. Steven said today that I care too much about what other people think of me. I need to base the decisions of my relationship on my feelings and my experiences alone. Of course, I value those around me and what they have to say, but this is a decision that will affect me, and mostly me, for time and all eternity.

And as of now, I am so happy. So, so happy and I am excited to see what lies ahead...